Private parts

In my convalescing state Grandma was in charge of bringing the boy to and from school. One day on the way home Grandma and the boy were having a particularly interesting conversation. As a woman wasn't driving just how Grandma felt she should a few good words fell out of her mouth. The boy, sitting in the back, felt the need to chime in..."ya Grandma, lets kick her in the private parts." Grandma giggled and replied, "good idea boy let's do that."

REALLY! Is there anything else I should know about these wonderful trips back and forth to school? I am now riding along and censoring all conversations. :)

It's begun...

The weather is beautiful so the family goes outside. Dad and Grandma work in the garage, mom works on the front garden and the kids head out to play with the neighborhood children. All the kids have been couped up in their houses for the winter and now they are released to get to know each other once again. Getting reacquainted can be tough for kids. As the mom I sit back and watch what is going on. (Sometimes I have trouble biting my tongue.) All ages play together for a little while. The pecking order has changed some. The older kids tolerate the younger ones for just a little bit. Everyone runs around like happy kids until they start breaking off into little groups. The older kids no longer want the little kids following them around. The younger kids break into smaller groups and feelings get hurt with some whispers and not wanting to play the same game. While we enjoy being outside and having our kids out with their friends this is just the beginning of all the "games" that these children "play." It's only been a few hours and I'm exhausted just from helping the kids "work out" their problems. Though I don't enjoy the cold weather of winter I must admit that sometimes it's much easier to just let the boy and girl play together in the basement where I can regulate what goes on. Outside with the other kids we have to let go and watch our kids giggles go to tears and back to giggles which can be a stressful time for us parents. Guess I'm going to have to suck it up and ride the ride of leading the kids down the right path. Would it be bad for me to whisper in their ears that mommy will always be here to wipe the tears and give the big hugs if they get their feeling hurt?

No ball in the house!

Just to let you know, it's not just mothers that have that "Mother of the Year" moment. Fathers too get to participate in that "what did I just do!" moment. Our Daddy had one of those moments just recently and I must say, it made me feel pretty good knowing I'm not the only "perfect" parent in this family. As it was, Grandma and I had gone out shopping and as stated before Daddy was "grounded" so the boy stayed home with him. It was a beautiful day so daddy and the boy went out to toss the ball around. It got a bit colder and a bit darker so they both headed into the house. Well as most parents know we don't play ball in the house, Daddy missed that in the parenting manual. Well he decided to practice catching ground balls with the boy in the house! Right as Grandma and myself pull into the driveway the boy went to catch a ball, his socks slipped and he fell face first onto the hardwood floor. I came into the house to a little boy with a purple goose egg on his forehead and a bottom lip sticking out in his traditional boo face. It stinks when that stuff happens but at least it wasn't on my watch!

Grounded

As a parent I thought I knew what grounding my child would entail. Sure, they commit some crime that needs to be dealt with so you ground them. They aren't allowed to enjoy normal every day activities such as playing outside with their friends or even playing inside with family. As the parent even though you have doled out this punishment it still breaks your heart when the child can not participate in those activities.

Well, something I hadn't anticipated, when your child is grounded...so are you! Oh yes, there are no impromptu meals out at a restaurant. No fun trips just because a warm day has come upon you. Sine the child is not allowed to leave his/her room when grounded, it ensures that when one parent runs out for something the other must stay in the house.. Yes, while grounding sounds like such an easy way to discipline it sure does make life much more difficult for us parents.

That was yesterday!

It's 5:45am and you are awoken by a scream "get out of my room!" What a way to start the day. After determining the source of the scream you decide to being your morning ritual which consists of getting the kids ready for school. After getting the girl back in her room you let her know what she will be wearing today, ha! like that would go smoothly. She looks at you like you're crazy offering up several different ideas, none of which are to your liking. With great reluctance she puts on what you tell her to wear. Of course pulling the pants on are a 10 mins. ordeal for her but hey, you get to brush your teeth! When she's done dressing you ask her to brush her hair. She comes down the stairs dressed in the outfit you chose and the front and side of her hair brushed with clips in. Of course she didn't brush the back because if she can't see it in the mirror, neither can you! You both move on to breakfast where the next fit begins "my cereal's all gone!" Well since you obviously should know when foods go missing or are finished up it's your fault! Once the very dramatic tears have finished (2 mins top) she decides on her second choice, oatmeal. Between chattering, singing and dictating what she wants for lunch the girl finishes her breakfast. She takes her bowl and cup to the sink and puts it down on the counter, she doesn't wash it, oatmeal is much to sticky for her to touch! Now she's off to brush her teeth. Of course those darn steps have moved since she came down so she's off to find them on her tour of the house, the family room, the living room, the dining-room and still no steps. Oh wait, there they are right in the middle of the house right where she left them, well off to brush her teeth! Making sure to put a glob of paste on her brush, run it under water and shove it in her mouth just long enough to spit the glob back into the sink she is now done. Dressed, hair brushed (kinda), breakfast eaten and teeth brushed (kinda) it's now time to head off to school.

Sitting back observing what I can, fighting when I don't want to and stopping the tears when they get out of control I believe I just may lose it before 8:00am

Well that was yesterday and everyday is a "second" chance, wish me luck!

Money

G-ma: "Here's a quarter, and here's 5 nickles. A quarter is 25 cents how much does 5 nickels equal?"

The Girl: "Ummm (counts by 5's) 25 cents!)

G-ma: "Right, they both are 25 cents!"

The Girl: "Grandma, how did they fit all those nickles in this quarter?"

Hard time remembering?

Aunt G: "I'm so sorry I forgot those Valentines for you and the girl. Things just fall right out of my brain."

The Boy: "Well if you don't turn your head sideways then it won't fall out!"

Aunt G: "So if I keep my head straight up it'll stay inside?"

The Boy: "Yes, and if you think it might fall out just put your hand over your ears."